What’s love got to do with it?

Why it matters and helping children and caregivers heal

Christine McGinley, MA Forensic Psychology, Clinical Director

With Valentine’s Day just behind us and Spring just around the corner, themes such as love, growth, and new beginnings come to mind. Here at Love Without Walls, we are passionate about serving our clients with love and dedication.  Let’s talk about the power of love and how important it is for healthy growth and development!

The ways people express, receive, and respond to love is significant. Children especially need to feel loved, protected, and nurtured from a young age to promote a healthy sense of self, self-esteem and self-worth.  It is the foundation of good mental health and developing healthy relationships for a lifetime.

How we nurture and care for children who have experienced a traumatic event in childhood is a delicate situation and requires an understanding of how these experiences have impacted them mentally, physically, and emotionally. According to an article by the APA (American Psychological Association) “(Children) living in neighborhoods (or similar environments) with high levels of violence can affect children’s development…potentially leading to poorer mental health and other negative outcomes.”*

“Other negative outcomes” could be a higher propensity towards physical abuse (victim or assailant), drug use and abuse, lack of education, unemployment, homelessness, and inability to maintain healthy relationships.  Specific childhood experiences and traumas that negatively impact a child’s healthy development include physical abuse, emotional abuse (either neglect or verbal abuse), exposure to drug and alcohol abuse, or even separation of caregivers.

A child’s developing brain processes this information much like a computer would process a virus which corrupts the whole system, leaving it unable to function properly. The result is poor mental health which may include feelings of guilt or shame.  There may be aggressive, violent behaviors, or behaviors which lean towards isolation, depression, or suicidal thoughts.

So how do we address childhood trauma in children?  According to the APA (2025), “Therapists use a variety of techniques to aid patients in reducing symptoms and improving functioning…(by) employing CBT Cognitive Behavioral Training)”.  CBT is only one way – among many methods – to not only address childhood trauma for children, but also adults.

TF-CBT Trauma Focused Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (TF-CBT) works for both the traumatized child and their caregivers as the treatment and healing process among child and parent must be concurrent.  This concurrency of treatment allows the best opportunity for ALL parties to heal.  Such areas of this type of therapy include addressing cognitive distortions.  An example of a distorted thought would be “A bad thing happened to me THEREFORE I am a BAD person.”  In addition to cognitive distortions, TF-CBT, addresses the caregiver’s distress and approaches the caregivers with a variety of coping skills to allow for healing.  As parents/caregivers implement coping skills and healing begins, this then “translates” into healing of the child.  In addition to support and guidance from the therapist, the child’s healing is supported by the example of the care giver.

Providing a safe and loving environment can be a simple preventive measure to ensure physical, mental and emotional well-being for children and caregivers.  A mental health professional can utilize methods such as TF-CBT to lay a healthy foundation for a family and their road to better mental health.

References*

*Living in violent neighborhoods affects children’s brain development, APA, February 22, 2024

**Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), APA, 2025

***Trauma-Focused CBT (TF-CBT): How It Works, Examples, & Effectiveness